Sleepykid

09-15-2044: Truth Exercise

I arrive at our joint session late - not due to any chemical influence, as I'm sure Sarah has inferred in my absence, but because I couldn't remember the ignition code to the new CattleBox. After 25 minutes of searching I'd given up and called for a ROE lift.

"We're doing truths," Sarah says to me in a tone that hides none of her annoyance; a 3rd grade teacher tone. She says it like we've discussed this before, so I respond agreeably, "Truths, cool. Sorry I'm late Catherine---"
"It's your dime, Mr. Castleton [she uses my last name to reprimand me, not unlike a 3rd grade teacher] - the one you should apologize to is your [she pauses to remember what the status is] ... your wife, Sarah here."
"Sorry Sarah."
Her mouth says, "It's nothing" while her body says, "It's everything"; she hasn't heard me apologize in so long that her parts can't decide what to do with it. The two 3rd grade teachers share a look that I catch in the wall mirror as I turn to hang my coat. There is so much collusion in this room it's stifling.
"Now, where were we?" Sarah resets.
"Sarah, I want you to take this pad and write out 25 things that you are too afraid to share with... [did she just forget my name?!] share with Gavin."
"Ok."
"And Gavin, take this one and do the same," she hands me a pad and pen.
"What kind of stuff am I writing here? Truths that she can't share with me?" I stall, feigning befuddlement.
"Truths. These are things that you feel strongly about but are too afraid to tell Sarah because... you're afraid to admit them... or you think you'll hurt her feelings... or she'll judge you---"
"We tell each other everything! There isn't one thing---"
she settles a hand on Sarah's knee, "It's just an exercise. Even in a very intimate relationship there are still things we keep hidden from one another---"
"Ok, here I go. Truths. Truths," I begin to play along. This is $400/hr, so I do my best to limit the amount of time we spend listening to Sarah pontificate. I am annoyed at how textbook an exercise this is, but if I'm going to get things back to normal - if I'm going to GET A KEY TO MY OWN HOUSE AGAIN(!) I have to jump through these stupid hoops and at least give off the appearance of cooperation.

My first few truths are, admittedly, sarcastic, but, to my surprise, somewhere after the first few the whole thing becomes a bit cathartic. When Catherine calls "Time!" I've only laid out 24 truths. I spent the last five minutes of the session trying to figure out which of eight remaining truths should be my number 25. I did not have time to notice if Sarah had struggled to complete the task. We gather our things and stand to leave, shaking Catherine's hand. I feel lighter, relieved even. I tell myself I will do this exercise on my own, regularly. "Good session guys, we are making progress. You have to believe that. Now next week we'll exchange lists and discuss." The blood drops out of my face and I lunge for the pad but she anticipates my reaction and pulls back, "Uh, uh Mr. Castleton! You have to TRUST here! This is all about PROGRESS!" It is at this distinct moment that I realize she and my wife have every intention of ending our marriage, and they've managed to get me to pay for the rope I will hang myself with.

This Felt Nice

This fine young gentleman covered my song 2045 and posted this on youtube.

Q&A w/ Rob Pemberton

TGC: What plugins were the most frequently used on this record and what were they used for? What about hardware?
RP: I use high pass and or lo pass filters on almost every track, and most of the time, I use Elemental Audio's Eqium. Another plugin I used is TC Powercore 1176, and my favorite plugin mdsp Analog Delay.

As for outboard:
Compressors = Pendulum Audio 6386, Tube Tech LCA2B, Empirical Lab Distressor, Manley ELOP, Chandler TG1
Equalizers = API 550B, API 550A, API 560, Calrec 1161, Chandler LTD-1, Meyer CP10.
Reverbs & FX = Eventide H3500, Lexicon PCM80 & 90, Yamaha SPX900, AKG BX20 spring reverb, Orban spring reverb, Delta Labs Effectron1 & 2, Symetrix 606 delays.
Mic Pre's: API 512, True Systems Precision 8, Calrec 1161, Chandler LTD-1

TGC: What is your favorite section of the record, and why?
RP: The dynamic of the songs Oregon and Beetlemeet, I still consider them both as one song. I don't think I've ever worked on or even heard a song go thru such a dynamic. I loved mixing it.

TGC: What was the most frustrating thing about this record?
RP: At one point in one tune Rufus Brothers was hitting the hi hat way louder then the snare drum. I had to patch in some extra processing to correct this. I think he did it on purpose to get me back for the pumpkin incident.

TGC: Give us a brief history of your engineering education.
RP: At 15 I started as an apprentice to a recording engineer (Pierre Paquin) who mostly recorded orchestra's. He introduced me to, and taught me the foundations of working as an audio engineer. From there I worked in various studio's, interning and, assisting other engineers, learning from anyone who knew enough to share some info. Then I started assisting for a great engineer named Phil Greene, he really taught me what I needed to continue on as an engineer. Then the real education began!

TGC: Was there ever a point in the making of Home that you wanted to hit Gavin in the face? If so, what were the circumstances?
RP: When he struck me out with his "T-Rex" pitch
TG: Everyone in the music industry seems to be suffering, career-wise. This is not the case with you - why is that?
RP: Well, I could be doing better. I could be earning millions making platinum records for contest winners, and other barely adequate musicians.

TGC: What kind of projects are your favorite to do? How can people contact you if they'd like to work with you?
RP: I like projects that challenge me. Those always seem to be the CDs I love to listen too after they are completed. I like to be pushed into getting different sounds, recording in unusual spaces, and doing things that aren't the usual way to do things.
For engineering, people can go to robpemberton.com and for everything else we do check out rpcaudio.com

TGC: Who are your favorite engineers and why?
RP: Rudy Van Gelder - when I listen to CDs, I often move my focus of listening to the technical side of the CD. I find myself picking apart the recording job. This is not the case with his work, he is a great engineer, possibly my favorite for that reason.
Tchad Blake his work inspires me to be more creative.
Al Schmitt for the huge amount of great work he's done, and Steve Albini as we share common views on the job of a recording engineer

TGC: Give us one sentence that sums up your approach to engineering.
RP: "Do anything possible to help the artist see his vision thru while being as transparent to the end result as possible."

I SAW U: Rick From Sprint

You: All-knowing, all-chewing, with interests in Portland weather tendencies
Me: Using up my limited minutes to order my 3rd faulty phone replacement

Despite the strictly auditory intro, I hear in your voice that we share similar interests (Cruellers, ice cream). You have my number, let's continue your speech about the benefits of costlier calling plans

When: Friday, August 22nd, 2008 4:14pm
Where: somewhere between Portland and New Delhi

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Micropoem: To the Twin Kids We Met at the Farm Today

you baptize me in the most revitalizing mud

05-15-2038: Take a Year Off

2038

It must've seemed strange when I came into the office
on the next day like as if nothing had changed
and I got my morning coffee and my yogurt from the fridge
my appearance made the secretary cringe
I was sitting at my desk, wondering why my tablet
won't unlock doing my best to look busy
now I've started sweating 'cause the drawer I keep my pills in
has been emptied out broke a pencil in my mouth
Victor's walking towards me with his tendons poppin' out
this is what he looks like when we lose a big account and
Victor doesn't like me 'cause I've worked here twice as long
I never made much of an effort to get along

I say "Good morning Victor"
he doesn't even answer
He just barges in and closes the door
he says

Take a year off, maybe you can come back
you've done some good work, it hasn't always been bad
you've written good code, taught me most of what I know
but you've been distracted and we have to let you go

Take a year off, maybe you can come back
you've done some good work, it hasn't always been bad
you've written good code, taught me most of what I know
but you've been distracted and we have to let you go

Suddenly I knew I'd heard him say these things before
Victor fired me yesterday - somehow I'd ignored him!

I was shocked, and furious, and mostly just embarrassed
even though the door was shut I knew that they were staring
Victor started telling me how I had shoved this girl
yesterday when she told me the coffee wasn't made

Victor said I had to leave but I was pleading with him
you should be embarrassed for firing a family man
I've been with this company for twenty four years
he said it was appreciated, but said it with a sneer

Hey I know that I haven't been that fun to be around
but even the interns have a way of talking down to me
Victor loosened up his tie and asked me not to shout
then Jim and Barry came along to escort me out

Take a year off, maybe you can come back
you've done some good work, it hasn't always been bad
you've written good code, taught me most of what I know
but you've been distracted and we have to let you go

Please Gavin

take a year off, maybe you can come back
try to get some help, get yourself on track
you don't understand how you look from where I am
you're not a stable man but you can be
you don't understand how you look from where I am
you're not a stable man but you can be

2038

The Largest Music Collection in the World

I SAW U: Rabid Cyclist

You: red-faced, balding, possibly homeless 40-70 year old caucasian male riding a rickety blue bike with nesting supplies hanging off it.
Me: 30 year-old male, cargo shorts, rap hat, holding two dogs, diving onto the grass nearby to avoid collision.

Our eyes met for one fleeting moment as you swerved away from the empty path and directly towards me, growling like the new Batman, "OPEN YOUR EYES, FREEEAAAK!"

Need a place to sleep? Let's meet up so I can find out if and why you were talking to me that way.

When: Thursday, August 14, 2008, 4:46pm.
Where: Waterfront Park walking path.

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The Michael Stipe of Funk Rap

Here's the first of several video from the Home vocal sessions.

03-05-2037: My Karma Speech

My mother used to say that my dad, for all his absentmindedness, would once in a while have sparks of clarity and objectivity during which he could suddenly explain and justify his actions. I know I got that trait from him. It used to happen all the time: after the murkiest of arguments I could suddenly tell a girlfriend exactly what line of logic I was following to arrive at the stupid things I did or said. Throughout my thirties this happened less and less and eventually disappeared. I hadn't looked on from that view in maybe twenty years. Until today, that is.
It's almost an out-of-body thing: I'm walking to the restaurant, nervous to see my son on neutral ground, and then poof! I'm a specimen. I'm watching myself shuffle down the sidewalk: my lined face, my squinted eyes that never focus on anything, my rhythm-less gate, my twitchy wrists, my chapped and permanently pursed lips. The explanation of what I am and why I am becomes so clear to me suddenly and I struggle to hold on to the revelation so that I can tell him, warn him. I can explain everything now and he'll be much better off than I was at twenty-three if I can just say this stuff right.

The concept I want to convey to him, the thing I never understood (or at least wasn't able to articulate) until this moment, is the concept of consequence.

It's the little things. Stupid things really.
Like back in two thousand-whatever when my glasses broke, I didn't stop to think about all the squinting I was doing as a direct result. I went without glasses for like three years because it seemed like an expensive hassle to get new ones. But just a few years later I had crow's feet and chronic migraines. Imagine that? Crow's feet at the age of thirty (most of my friends haven't seen a single wrinkle yet). And my stupid brain didn't really put two and two together, didn't establish causation. I just looked in the mirror one morning, saw the tiny tributaries running to my eye sockets, and thought, "Oh. This is happening."

I suffered through allergies for my entire childhood. One day, at twenty-eight, I stopped ingesting dairy and promptly the blowy nose and gooeytoothed mornings evaporated. Why did it not occur to me that what was going into my body was affecting what was coming out of it? Why was I unable to relate the two until I was almost thirty?

Or take my long and sordid affair with bad credit - it ruined my thirties, thank you very much. I'd always thought that those financial hiccups of my late teens would work themselves out when the music took off, so I took the collection notices and lease-less squalor I constantly found myself living in as harmless. Four years later, watch my face when I try to get my first car loan. The monthly interest was higher than the monthly payment itself.

Life just never seemed that real for me, I guess. I wasn't IN it - my life. It was as if I was always waiting for the "living" part to start, and once I realized it was indeed heavily underway, I'd missed most of it, or screwed it up.

And so I think this is what aging actually is: the realization that you are indeed deciding the route your life takes, and you are doing so on a moment-to-moment basis. Every minute action or decision you make has very tangible consequences, both long term and short. I know it's so incredibly common sense when spoken, but that doesn't mean that you or I really grasp the validity of it so easily. And this realization of causation is what adulthood is, I think. Why is mine happening so late? I'm going to be sixty in a few months, and I'm just now learning this. I have been a late bloomer all my life, I suppose.

"Every cause has an effect." That's what I need to tell him---but worded cooler, somehow. Kids don't take well to the word "Karma," you have to put it in their terms... relate it to Hoverboards or something. Most of them doubt its very existence, but I happen to know there's such a thing as Karma. I'm living proof of it.
Or "life is something that happens when you're making other plans." That's what I have to say to him, but more profound sounding, so he respects me as a thoughtful person. Something poetic too, like, "Life hits you where you least expect it - in the 'life.' "
I don't know.
That doesn't feel right. Feels stupid.
"Life is the realest thing since death." Ug. everything I say comes out sounding like a tagline from an old M. Night Shyamalan movie [Whatever happened to that guy? I never read another thing about him after he got sued out of existence by the Rod Sterling estate].

I'm heading into the restaurant now, and I haven't quite finalized the wording, but I feel good about it. This is the best wisdom I could pass on to him.

When I sit down across from him, I want to be upright and alert so that I can deliver this message with all the authority needed to drive it home. But his disapproving gaze slumps me over and I'm altogether dismissed by the waiter, an angular boy who never looks at me (even as he takes my drink order). The only features of my son's face that were inherited from mine are his contrary brow and the overriding contempt for his father, the softening of which seems an insurmountable task now that I'm two feet across from it. I clear my throat and tell him, "You look good, Chris." He does not return the compliment, but then, we both know I look like Baghdad right now.
"What's the deal, Gavin?" [Is there a less subtle method of castrating one's own father than using his first name?]
I cough and look for a drink to animate this sandpaper tongue in my mouth. The waiter has not brought me my drink.
Chris is going to walk out on me again very soon. I can see his shoulders turning towards the door. if I don't impart some of this wisdom I've accrued on him soon, I know there will never be another window for us. Just getting him to meet me here was a two-month effort. No, no. I have to be truthful---it was not so much my effort as it was Talbot's (my sponsor).

"you should. you should NOT squint at stuff as much... as...
I. did.
you have. you have to live with stuff. Hoverboards are like Karma, you have to keep your.
balance.
if you---"

"Gavin.

'Dad.'

Get help," He said, shedding $40 onto the table as he put his coat on and stood up in one fluid motion. I tried to stand up but my legs were in their own time zone and he was gone before I could put his drink down.

Guitar Tones for Home

All of the guitar parts, minus the acoustic, were tracked with a Strat, played through one of three amps: a Mesa Mark IV, a Fender Deluxe, or an Ampeg 1965 Reverbarocket (with a Mojo tone speaker). We used SM57's, a Royer ribbon mic, and an SM81 for a room mic (that went largely unused in the mixing process). To aid with continuity, we developed 11 different tones, assigned each part to one of those tones, and then recorded all the parts with a prospective tone before moving on to the next. The process is described in more detail here.

50's VERB:
Track 2 (whole thing)
Track 14
Track 15

PORTISHEAD/TORTOISE VIBRATO VERB:
Track 4
Track 11
Track 15

REGGAE VERB W/ SPLIT LINE 6 DELAY(Ampeg left subtle delay, Deluxe right main delay):
Track 11
Track 14

TWINKLY CLEAN W/ LINE 6 DELAY:
Track 3 (beginning and end arpeggios)
Track 14

ELECTRIC WHALES:
Track 10
Track 14

HOTEL CALIFORNIA ACOUSTIC:
Track 3 (end - both rhythm and arpeggios)
Track 7

CHICKEN FUNK:
Track 1
Track 4
Track 5
Track 9 (whole thing)

INDIE/MAJOR LABEL ROCK (distorted):
Track 2
Track 3
Track 10

COCKY LEAD:
Track 6
Track 10

PHIL SPEKTOR DISTORTED:
Track 7
Track 12

RATATAT/QUEEN LEAD:
Track 5
Track 6
Track 11

Drum Tunings for Home

Each song on Home has it's own drum tunings and setup fit to the chord progressions and mood of each respective song. Various drum choices (especially snare drums) were repeated in songs with similar themes or genres to help with continuity.

TRACK 1 - GMAJ, D MAJ, G DIM
KICK: Pacifica 22" tuned to D (no front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to E
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to B
FLOOR TOM 3: Gretch 16" tuned to D
SNARE: Pearl 14" tuned to D

TRACK 2 - D MAJ, Bb MINOR
KICK: Ludwig 20" tuned to E (front head, no hole)
TOM 1: Ludwig 12" tuned to A
FLOOR TOM: Ludwig 14" tuned to E
SNARE: Red DW 13" tuned to E

TRACK 3 - F MAJ, G MIN
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to E
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to A
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to E
SNARE: Mapex 14" tuned to E

TRACK 4 - DMIN 9
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to D
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to A
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to E
SNARE: Mapex 14" tuned to E

TRACK 5 - G9
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to F
FLOOR TOM: Pacifica 16" tuned to C
SNARE: DW 13" tuned to F

TRACK 6, 12 - C MIN6
KICK : Pacifica 22" (with no front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to E
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to B
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to D
SNARE: Pearl 14" tuned to D

TRACK 7 - E MAJ
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10E tuned to E
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to E
SNARE: DW 13" tuned to F

TRACK 9 - G MIN
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with no front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to Bb
TOM 2: Picifica 12" tuned to G
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to D
SNARE: Mapex 14" tuned to E

TRACK 10 - Db MIN 9
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with no front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to E
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to B
FLOOR TOM: Gretch 16" tuned to E
SNARE: Pearl 14" tuned to D

TRACK 11, 14 - BMIN, FMIN
KICK: Pacifica 22" (with no front head)
TOM 1: Pacifica 10" tuned to C
TOM 2: Pacifica 12" tuned to A
FLOOR TOM 2: Gretch 16" tuned to D
SNARE: Red DW 13" tuned to D

Q&A With Brian Cass

Brian Cass is many things to many people. To some, he is a gifted guitar instructor. To others, he is a synthesis guru with a penchant for improvised tweakage. And to some others' other, he's a volatile nerdly fellow who is overly obsessed with his substandard silky terrier. But to me, he is a kindred spirit. He made huge contributions to my upcoming release Home and participated in much of the mixing and mastering process. Here are his thoughts...

TGC: What kind of software did you use on this record?

BC: What kind? The awesome kind -
Ableton Live 7.0.7
Native Instruments Reaktor, FM8 and Guitar Rig
Puremagnetik Micropaks
Soundhack 0.896
Skype 2.7
Peak Pro 5.2
Mac OS X Leopard

TGC: What is your favorite section of the record, and why?

BC: If we're considering "section" to be a period in time - I'd say, right now, it'd be the ladybugs, but for long-term listening pleasure I predict Credits will be my favorite.

If we're considering "section" to be a part of the musical ensemble - I'd say da drums.

If we're considering "section" to be portion of the audio spectrum - I'd say everything between 50hz and 150hz is what gets the party started.

TGC: How would you describe your collaboration with Rob and myself?

BC: I think that sometimes I'm translating between the two of them.
Sometimes I'm showing up just in time to rescue them from a redundant 32 bar intro.
Sometimes I'm providing substitute dog presence in lieu of Lu.
Other times I'm leading them into a dark cave of one of my terribly zany (aka - pure genius) binaural experiments.
But it's always about a shared vision of awesomeness.

TGC: What are your current projects/employment?

BC: Musically - I am The Overclock Orchestra, the Outer Space Electronic Guitar DJ.
Working with Rob as RPC Audio, building recording studios and making gold records.
Working with Puremagnetik, making sound content for our subscribers as well as for Ableton, Native Instruments.

TGC: Give us a brief history of your musical education.

BC: I had a music program on my Commodore 64, it allowed you to automate filter cutoffs and LFOs just as easily as writing a basic melody, this was before I ever picked up a guitar. At age 12 I started guitar lessons with my one and only quality guitar teacher (Jimmy Tavares). Later in High School I helped build a midi recording studio for the school, then to Berklee in Boston, where I majored in Music Synthesis. All along, the technical and the musical have gone together like peanut butter and jars.

TGC: Was there ever a point in the making of Home that you wanted to hit Gavin in the face? If so, what were the circumstances?

BC: Yes of course, I hit him in the face on numerous occasions, verbally and spiritually that is.

TGC: If a dude could hit a whiffle ball frontside and backside, what kind of pitch would you use to smoke him out?

BC: No two-armed man can do both. But if there were a four armed being capable, then a knuckle curve with a second and third whiffle balls tossed inches behind it.

TGC: What kind of projects are your favorite to do? How can people contact you if they'd like to work with you?

BC: I like making good music. I specialize in electronic elements and guitar trickery.
As a team with Rob Pembertone, we can accomplish any and all recording related requests.
I can be contacted through brian at RPCAudio dot com.

TGC: Who are your favorite current musicians? What are your top 5 albums of all time?

BC: Current Favorites -
Everything Daptone Records
Transchamps (and all ingredients thereof)
The Bad Plus
Radiohead
Justice
Ebu Gogo
Gavin Castlepants (but don't tell him i said that or he'll have less respect for me)

Top "5" All Time -
Django Reinhardt - HMV Sessions
DJ Shadow - Endtroducing...
Daft Punk - Discovery
Aphex Twin - Richard D. James Album
Hugh Masekela - Lasting Impressions of Ooga Booga
Mr. Bungle - Mr. Bungle
Little Miss Sunshine Soundtrack
Life Aquatic Soundtrack

TGC: Give us one sentence that sums up your approach to making music.

BC: "Channelling 1000 Volts of heartfelt sonic love into a consumable, yet renewable, digital mystery machine for peace."

Another Side to Downloading

This is just a small fraction of the production equipment graveyard we saw in the floors above Battery Studios on West 25th St. It was at one time part of the Sony Recording arsenal. I've also published pictures from the mixing and mastering sessions on myspace and facebook.

Micropoem: The Wasatch and Oquirrh Mountains Hugging UT Valley

you loom as eternal parents, sometimes chaperon, sometimes security