Micropoem: Rose and Thistle and Both of You

Our high school stories are unblurable - centering, even

The Best Live Performance I've Ever Seen

Recently I saw these guys play at the Goodfoot in Portland, OR, and I can easily say that they put on the best live performance I've ever seen. They trumped Radiohead, Bjork, Keith Jarrett, Tom Jones, and Jesus Jones easily within their first 15 minutes.

Their set-up was simple but effective - an ipod nano, mounted in what looked like a Native American teepee/Buddhist shrine and surrounded by glowing voodoo skulls. A large gong suspended behind them, and lit tiki torches lining the stage with tribal masks and fake plants snaking around them.




Goldenface and Getty, two vocalists of Skabb, emerged from the wings in twin velvet hooded robes, moving across the stage reverently to what sounded like Gregorian chanting with pan flute and a RZA beat under it, and proceeded to pray to the Nano shrine until a man in a lab coat and goggles (ostensibly the one called "Braun Krauss") struck the gong, signaling their first song - Liar Liar.



What followed is impossible to describe. It was like a sweat lodge in there - and not just because these guys were donning tribal head dresses and putting wampum down girls' shirts. Goldenface and Getty put out enough aerobic force to power London, while Braun Krauss kept his finger on the pulse of the crowd, sometimes literally: in one segment he lured women on stage to listen to their palpitations with an enlarged stethoscope hung around his neck like Flavor Flav MD, matching the bpm of the pounding kick to the the flustered girl's heart rate, which was purportedly rising as Getty molested her left leg. In another, Goldenface lit Getty's robe on fire with a tiki torch, then poured red wine over his head to put it out! With the loudest kick drum I've ever heard thumping, stripped bare of the heavy synthesis and funk bass prevalent in their music, Getty fell to his knees and begged the ladies in the front row to "partake of my sacrament." Basically, this dude had 3 hipster chicks lick wine off him and then launched full on into their most sacrilegious anthem - Beat Baptism.



It was a circus. It was an alien siting. It was a 40-minute blitzed weight-loss program. It was Skabb.

Polkadotpropaganda

In a concerted effort to promote my Halloween single + remix to a wider audience, I offered each of my nieces $10 and a highly-sought-after burrito recipe to troll their prospective neighborhoods in ladybug form on Halloween night. Two took the bait (the other 14 refused, citing creative differences). We hope to see a sizable bump in the 0-4 year old demographic with this record, and I have these two darlings to thank for that.

Recent Live Footage of Ebu Gogo

"DSurfNA" live at The Fire in Philly, PA on 8/30/08



"Dkembe Boombwembwe" live at The Fire in Philly, PA on 8/30/08



"Never Ending Hole + H.U.G.S." live at The Fire in Philly, PA on 8/30/08



"Late Due to Sweatpants Boner" live at The Fire in Philly, PA on 8/30/08



"Wordy Wordpenis + Bleargrarghhh" live at The Fire in Philly, PA on 8/30/08



"Waterworld pt. 1: Limp Joust" live at The Hudson House in Nyack, NY on 8/29/08



"DSurfNA" live at The Hudson House in Nyack, NY on 8/29/08



Here are some more from our last show in Providence.

A Loving Letter from One Member of My Family to Another

This email from a relative is some sort of response to a question about the objectivity of a particular McCain/Obama comparison chart circulating on our family email list. Aside from the comic value, it is demonstrative of the diversity in my Castleton blood.

"If you had the contacts and resources I have, Obama's economic packages would be the least of your worries. But since I want to keep my sources I'll just share my 2 bits on one really public and easy one.

Barak Obama has made his position on abortion adamantly clear with his voting record of over 13 years. Specifically voting against, providing life support to late term abortion babies that survived the actual abortion. The current practice is to "neglect" these babies until they are Dead! That's murder Sis and that is what Obama voted to support! at least twice! and still stands for. I have spent 7 years among other things working with women who have had abortions, about 30 who I know of because they told me, about twice that many that I suspected because of what they said and how they acted. I have seen for myself the evil and emotional destruction that evil brings upon them. I have seen the effects of the mental health medicines month after month as they try to combat the emotional trauma. It's real Sis, the pain is terrible and they can't get rid of it, and those of us who have even a small gift for empathy find it nothing short of traumatic month after illegal and legal drug infested month. Don't you EVER pontificate around me your personal theoretical untested beliefs on abortion, or I will burn your ears off with the "this is what happens in this real world we living" truth and a first hand chance to see for yourself. There are only three types of people who support Abortion in any form. 1) People who have an imbecilic knowledge of actual abortion and would rather "do what every body says will feel good" rather than "study it out and get at the whole destructive truth" and are too pride full listen to the wisdom God shoved right in our faces through science and proper priesthood leadership. 2) People who actually enjoy murder, inflicting pain, power, and find this to be one of several legally safe and profitable way to do it. (sociopath) and 3) Stark raving lunatics. I've met an worked with all three types, at length.

I've recognized the stupidity, in some cases I've felt the pain, in others I've had glimpses of how they think, as they've explained why they did what they did. None of it was excuse-able interwoven in all of it was misery.

Bottom line Sister (and Dad), the prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ has clearly stated that Abortion of any kind other than a few very rare and specific situations, is wrong or more pointedly put, flatly Evil. The truth is there is one prophet, one gospel, and one inspired constitution to this country. In all of the issues that matter to Lord, there is one candidate for president this year who either equals or far exceeds the other in everyway. One prophet and about 7 million LDS votes to back him up, or was it that when you raised your hand to sustain Thomas S. Monson, you were just being polite. Thomas S. Monson IS the prophet of the Lord. He did vote for the president of the United States, and any member of this church willing to do 20 minutes research will know exactly who he and all eligible general authorities voted for. We have been INSTRUCTED to use our heads and FOLLOW HIS EXAMPLE. Either we will do as instructed or we won't. There is only one LAW in heaven and it amounts to one word, "Obedience". God wants Intelligent, Intentional, Loyal, Constant Obedience. And he wants it right now, and he wants it to "endure to the end". His end and his ends, not our end.

My personal belief is that this one question is what determines the difference between the civilian and the soldier. When the civilian waves at the leader he says "your mission is nice I hope you succeed." When the soldier salutes the leader he says "all that I am, all that I have, that our mission succeeds under your leadership". Yes Sis my perspective is different, This is MY country, this is MY Gospel and there isn't a snowballs chance on a hot July afternoon in Death Valley, I will give either up.

If you all ever again feel the need vitrify this (there are no words to describe this filthy vileness you so lightly play with) please do it in a venue that does not include me and my family."