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Monday, October 17, 2016

The Weirdest Trophy

I landed on your golf course late last night
I camped up in a tree, sharpening my knives and aim.
I came to hunt the strangest game.
Rest assured, big man,
I only wanna bring you fame. 

And when the sun came up I was primed for the kill
I waited in a sand trap, armed to the gills
but no,
you never made it to the second hole.

Now I know that we should only hunt the best of a species
and everything about this dude is definitely feces
but none of us have ever seen a skull as thick as his! 

Let me take that big weight off your shoulders!
Let me help you out of all that old loose skin— 
we can make you something great again
(It’s a rare thing to see)
Now your head could be the most peculiar trophy that I’ll ever win.  

I climbed to the window of your penthouse suite and
saw you dancing in your bathrobe, hookers at your feet
but no gun;
nothing you could shoot but crack.
I try to play by the rule: only kill what could kill you back.

But then you walked to the window, dripping in wealth.
Were you looking at me or were you staring at yourself? 
Who knows… 
until you go and drop that robe :(

Now I know you thought that you were simply humping your reflection,
but where I come from that’s a textbook gesture of aggression.
You left me with no other choice but to destroy you from the neck down!

Let me take that big weight off your shoulders!
Let me help you out of all that old loose skin— 
You’ll be more human than you’ve ever been. Please!
Let me take that big weight off your shoulders!
Let me help you out of all that old loose skin— 
We can make you something great again
(It’s a rare thing to see)
Now your head could be the most peculiar trophy that I’ll ever win.  

I smash through the window
and I knock you on your back.
To show you my respects
I disconnect and drop my mask.
Then suddenly I lose you in the room without a trace— 
you blend into the background with your fire-colored face!

Let me take that big weight off your shoulders!
Let me help you out of all that old loose skin!

I’ve hunted everything from Xenomorphs to Carl Weathers…
Special Forces, Tarzan, fuckers with their shit together.
No one ever pulled a spineless stunt like this before—
Cowardice on par with Killers in the Three World War!

By the time I get my mask back on this gorgeous face,
the Orange One is gone and I’ve become a big disgrace!
I don’t care who you are back in the world—

you ghost me again… I’ll bleed you… real quiet

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