My Life Is One Big Technical Difficulty

I just arrived home from my brief CA tour. I played 5 shows. Check it:
1. The Portable (in SJ) - my entire rig fell over.
2. Bottom of the Hill (SF) - the mic shocked me for two entire songs.
3. Anno Domino (SJ) - two songs into the show, all my levels went wacky and blurried up my loops. The vocal mic was all peaking for the last two songs.
4. Plush Cafe (Fullerton) - my vocal and the kick drum both distorted for most of my 15 minute set.
5. Hotel Cafe (LA) - doing a very much dumbed down set of just one pedal and a real piano, the power to the pedal fails when it's time to do the looping tracks, and refuses to stay on when plugged in anywhere on stage. I spend five minutes wiring in my other pedal.

I started looking through my past solo shows and trying to remember what happened at them. Any of you who have been to a GavCaz performance can probably attest to the fact that EVERY SINGLE ONE HAS BEEN RIDDLED WITH TECHNICAL PROBLEMS.
I'm no millionaire. My equipment is not always top of the line. I don't really have nice roadcases. These are all factors. But we're talking about maybe 80-100 shows here. We're way past coincidence at this point... and it's not as simple as setting one's sites on the disfunctional piece of equipment and fixing it. EVERY PART OF MY SETUP HAS BEEN ROTATED IN AND OUT FOR OTHER STUFF AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER.
Is God trying to tell me something? Because at this point, my solo show usually consists of a few songs, and then 20 minutes of jokes. Does God want me to do standup? Or am I missing the bigger "JUST QUIT DUDE" message altogether? I've tried to explain it to my man Kenji at the label: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT I DO. IF I DID A SHOW WITH JUST A MICROPHONE, IT WOULD EXPLODE 1/2 WAY THROUGH THE FIRST SONG. IF I DID A SHOW WITH JUST ME SHOUTING, I WOULD SUDDENLY GET HERPES.
This is just my lot in life. I've accepted it. I've even got kind of good at interacting with people while it's going down. Does it help sell records? I don't really think so. Would any of you buy a record that was a montage of my equipment screwing up and me berating myself and the companies that manufacture my equipment? That's the next step. Just say the word.